Reactive VS Proactive----Parents on the Edge
Posted: Thursday, May 28, 2009
by Sandra E. Graham
My Books and Articles
What is it that makes too many parents more reactive than proactive when it comes to child safety? Are we becoming too complacent in our present day lifestyle securities? As the news on a daily basis recounts the accidental death of children under five years old, I can't help but wonder; how can this be? Where were the parents of this child? What could they be doing that was more important than a child's safety? Of course, we all know that accidents happen and not all accidents can be avoided. But all too often the causes of these accidental deaths of very young children are all too often glaring 20/20 hindsight. Why do parents not spend a little extra time saying, "Let's do this" rather than saying, "Why didn't I.?"
No matter how many times you purchase an article with warnings of KEEP OUT OF REACH OF CHILDREN and bring it home; there is always the one time that the warning goes unnoticed, ignored, or maybe it isn't there at all, because it is something that no one thought could be a hazard-until it's too late. Most manufacturers, especially of children's toys try to think proactively-they have a lot to lose. Now it is time that parents begin to think proactively-they have even more to lose.
My love of children and babies has prompted me to ask-no plead, beg-parents and grandparents to please become proactive in your baby's safety. Look for the obvious safety hazards, and then look again and again for the not so obvious. Don't leave anything to chance. Know where your child is at all times and the very young should be within view or checked on more often than you think necessary. Nothing, absolutely nothing can replace a lost child!
Call me obsessive, but when SIDS became a household word, my babies slept between my husband and myself until they were well past the age of incidence. And we each took turns placing our hands on our babies back through out the night just to check for breathing. We now do the same with our grandbabies, when they spend the night. I'm sure DR. SPOCK' would roll over in his grave if he knew that I read his book thoroughly with my first baby, then tossed it in the trashcan and raised my children my way.
When a parent loses a baby, especially through accidental death, the devastation can be two-fold. A baby's death can put the parent or parents on the edge, or worse, over the edge. Then not only is the child lost but a spouse or parent of other siblings can be lost as well. Don't let your baby become a statistic, don't let your family suffer the unthinkable-become that Proactive Parent and be there for your children.
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Top-level comments on this article: (8 total)Good advise Sandra. We tossed the book by Dr. Spock out also. This would be good advise for a lot of parents today.Thanks so much, John, for reading and commenting.And Welcome to Searchwarp.Sandra
An important piece, especially with the news of what happened to Mike Tyson's little girl. Which at least gives Safety issues with children more attention from the Press.Yes, it is all too sad for words. I have great sympathy for little Exodus' family.Thank you so much for reading and commenting.And Welcome to our Searchwarp group.Sandra
you are a moother and thts ehy i like your writing in the baby even the child is a gate to heaven please keep wrting sandra it is goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooodddddddddddddd to write.Thank you so much, Tonye. And welcome to our Searchwarp group.Sandra
Hi Sandra, Excellent advice. But I am confused, isn't Dr. Spock that guy from Star Trek? HA. I never even had his book. We did what we felt comfortable. I remember too much competion when Britt was little. Is she walking yet, talking, potty-trianed? and on... all thanks to Dr. Spock. Funny, Britt can walk, talk, and yes, she can even us the girls room all by her self :-)Seriously, you make great points and unfortunately, sometimes its not laughter that ends the tale. I pray many parents and grandparents would heed this advice. God bless! TeresaThank you, Teresa, and yes, advice from Star Trek would have been just as good.Thanks for reading and commenting.Sandra
Thanks for this, Sandra. We don't want to get paranoid, but we should use common sense when it comes to our children's safety.I remember when our son was just a newborn. He was in the bedroom next to ours. One night my wife woke up in a panic and ran to our son's room. I followed, confused, not knowing why she was in such a panic. When I saw my son, he was lying in his crib and was already turning blue. He was not breathing. He was so tiny, that I picked him up with one hand by his ankles, hanging him upside down, and smacked him on the back. He gave a gasp, then started crying. Call it mother's intuition, Providence, whatever, but if she had not woke up and ran for his bedroom, our son would not be alive today.Your story gave me chill bumps. It is so frightening how quickly things can happen to children. When my oldest son was small and I was just a young, clueless mother, he got a plastic bread wrapper twistie (actually the square plastic kind) stuck in his throat. I didn't know what to do but my reaction was grabbing him up (as you said) upside down, slapping him sharply on the back. The plastic obstacle popped out and slammed against the far wall of the room it all happened so quickly--and he was fine. Mother's intuition is a wonderful thing.Sandra
I can feel the passion as well as the frustration. I have shared the exact same sentiments with friends and former co-workers. I cannot believe the carlessness in the way some parents care for their beautiful helpless babies. I shake my head in wonder sometimes when I see or hear of children being neglected and or abused. We must pray for their safety on a continuous basis.Amen, Jena. Thanks for reading and commenting--and welcome to searchwarp.Sandra
Thanks for writing on an important topic Sandra. It can be difficult for parents to be aware of their children one hundred percent of the time, but unfortunately it only takes seconds for a tragedy to occur. As parents, I'm sure we can all recall a moment when, if not for the grace of God, a tragedy could have occurred to our own child. My heart goes out to those parents who live with the 'if only's' after suffering the loss of a child to an accident, that may not have been foreseen.Thanks for reading and commenting, Brianna and have a good day.Sandra
hi sandra,a wonderful article.i watch nancy grace, and i am appalled at the number of missing children, and the fact that their parents were not close by.this latest case is of a 5 year old girl, playing in the parking lot!i never took my eyes off my kids until they went to school, and even then, i was concerned for them.i once heard someone on a talk show say to get down on all fours, and crawl around the house, seeing things of danger you may otherwise not notice.sometimes, we forget we dropped a button, and couldn't find it, or a needle while we were sewing.there is not enough we can do to ensure our children's safety, and if we can't be bothered to do so, we shouldn't be parents.no one ever said it was an easy job, and many times, pregnancy is simply the result of wanting to have sex. the repercussions of such could easily lead to death for the child, as in the casey anthony case.thanks for sharing,my best regards,sueThank you for reading and commenting, Sue. Have a great day.Sandra
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